Review of Commando

Introduction

Who would have thought in 1985 that Big Arnie would end up Governor of California? At this point he was just gearing up for a successful 80`s career as action blockbuster superstar and no-one would have taken any political ambitions seriously at this point. Still, stranger things have happened…

John Matrix (Schwarzenegger) is a retired Colonel who served in the US Special Forces and now lives in the countryside with daughter Jenny (Alyssa Milano). Matrix`s old unit are being killed off one by one (despite all having new identities), and General Franklin Kirby (James Olsen) kindly leads the killers to Matrix where they capture him and kidnap his daughter. It appears that they don`t actually want Matrix dead (yet), rather he is to be a reluctant gun for Arius (Dan Hedaya). Matrix and his unit deposed Arius, with Matrix being awarded Hero of the Revolutiion by the new President. Arius wants Matrix to travel to Val Verde and kill the President so that he can return to power, only Matrix is trusted enough to get close to the unnamed man in power.

Obviously being Arnie, Matrix is having none of it and promptly kills his escort and jumps off his plane via the landing gear into the marsh conveniently placed at the end of the runway. A chance and unwanted encounter with yuppie-type Sully (David Patrick Kelly) brings air hostess Cindy (Dawn Rae Chong) into the view of Matrix, who shows his appreciation for her sports car by ripping out the seat. Cindy initially looks to escape from the big lunk, but soon converts to loving the big man and doing virtually anything for him without any questions (albeit with a few high-pitched screams).

Matrix has just under 11 hours to find the secret hidey hole of Arius and former soldier (now just plain camp psycho) Bennett (Vernon Wells) and rescue his beloved daughter so she can take her place as one of the `Charmed Ones` at a later date in TV history.

Video

Considering its age, the picture on this 2001 DVD is very good. I couldn`t detect any blemishes, although the picture did suffer from bouts of grain now and again.

Audio

Dolby Digital 2.0 soundtrack that feels a little muted and not helped by James Horner seemingly pretending to be a poor man`s Jan Hammer with what appears to his take on Hammer`s work on Miami Vice. The main soundtrack is a steel drum soaked theme that quickly gets annoying as the Caribbean feel doesn`t seem to fit with what is happening on screen.

One surprise is the obligatory soft-rock song over the end credits. Generally this is a band you`ve never heard of, and this did seem to be one of those, so imagine my surprise when I found out it was short-lived Duran Duran side project Power Station, presumably with Michael De Barres on vocals as Robert Palmer had already left.

Features

Just a trailer, and not a good copy either.

Conclusion

Commando is one of the definitive action films of the 80`s, although clearly it`s not a film to take seriously at all. In fact, if you took a closer look at it, you could quickly see all the cracks and plot holes without even trying. This film also introduces us to the concept of Arnie as the one-line gag king of celluloid, not something anyone probably thought possible after his earlier roles and with that accent.

The crux of the matter is that Commando is just one big cheese fest and you`ll either love it or hate it. This was one of those films I caught whilst growing up in the 80`s and so I love it despite all the flaws. One of the clear flaws in most Arnie speaking roles is his accent, whilst it has softened over the years, it`s quite harsh here. You may be wondering how a guy with such a strong Germanic accent made it to Colonel in the US Special Forces. You`re not the only one. Arnie tries to explain away his accent during a discussion with his daughter at the start of the film where he disses Boy George in one her pop culture magazines: "You know when I was a boy and rock`n`roll came to East Germany, the communists said it was subversive". And then, nothing…

Aside from Arnie, the other big plus point in this films favour is a standout villain. Vernon Wells is excellent as the larger than life character of Bennett, although unless recruitment standards are not that hot in the US Special Forces, I`m confused as to how he ever made rank of Captain. Bennett is a completely over the top character, presumably meant to be seen by the audience as a psychopath. Looking at his character with older and experienced eyes however makes the campness of Bennett very much clearer. The outfit doesn`t help; tight leather trousers and chain mail vest? Please. What makes it worse are the close-ups of Bennett during the big finale fight with Matrix. Screwing up his face in close-up just reminds me of one of the Chuckle Brothers and you can`t help but laugh.

Alyssa Milano gives quite a feisty performance prior to finding bigger fame as a TV star in her own right and Lads mag pinup. Dawn Rae Chong is actually a little annoying as the air hostess whose only purpose seems to be the romantic link. All she does is scream a lot, fire a rocket launcher and generally whinge. Still Arnie needs her as remarkably he can`t fly (although he can do just about everything-else) and she just happens to be taking her pilots licence. And on top of that, despite clearly wanting rid of him whilst he`s tracking Sully, she is completely in love with him by the end.

Arnie also stretches credibility more than a bit by first kitting up in the secret weapons compartment of a gun shop (rocket lauchers, anyone?), and then by landing on the secret island manned by Arius` private army and taking them all out single handed. Why does the US need such a big army if one Special Force op can do so much damage, and a retired one at that?

All this criticism and you`d think I hated this film. Well I don`t. This film promises to give you a good time and it does exactly that. Arnie kills lots of people and branches out into stand-up whilst doing it. What could be better? The one thing that did amaze me was that the inferior and nowhere near as glossy Raw Deal actually came after this film. This is one of Schwarzenegger`s stand-out films and rightly takes its place alongside some of the best action films of the 80`s and 90`s, and most of which starred him anyway. Just don`t take it too seriously…