Review of Soft Beds, Hard Battles

Introduction

Although ultimately you might feel the movie doesn`t deserve it, I felt that Soft Beds, Hard Battles deserved a second opinion. After all, the movie stars Peter Sellers, playing more characters than he did in Dr. Strangelove; and it was written and directed by Roy Boulting. The Boulting Brothers, John and Roy, were responsible for some of the great movies of British Cinema, such as Brighton Rock, Private`s Progress, Carlton-Brown of the FO and (best of all) I`m All Right, Jack. There should be something more there than just a tawdry sex comedy.

Okay, it is a sex comedy, although I`ve seen tawdrier. This 1973 film is a story in the tradition of tv`s `Allo `Allo, although it was made ten years before Rene Artois poured his first Pernod. A fine mix of innuendo and jokes of both the wartime and smutty varieties, this picture will appeal to fans of fare such as the Carry Ons or similar Britcom movies of the early 1970`s. It is the story of a small Parisian brothel`s vital role in the course of World War Two, and of course involves a lot of Germans, a number of scantily-clad young ladies, a young American who finds himself in the Resistance and a collection of characters played by Peter Sellers.

Sellers plays a total of six roles. Seven if you include the narration he also provided (but which was cut for the general release print.) The pivotal roles he plays are a British officer who initially finds himself behind enemy lines, Schroeder, the local head of the Gestapo and - completely unrecognisable - Prince Kyoto of the Japanese Army. Sellers gets excellent support from the rest of the cast, notably Curt Jurgens as the Military Governor and Lila Kedrova as Madame Grenier, but most interesting are the madam`s girls - and who plays them. There is a pre-Magpie Jenny Hanley (unrecognisable in a black wig), Francoise Pascal (from Mind Your Language), Rula Lenska and Gabriella Licudi (from Casino Royale). The latter two of these turn in the inevitable smattering of toplessness demanded by an adult-oriented movie of the time.

There is a terminal flatulence gag in the movie that will undoubtedly appeal to modern audiences, but all in all the picture is pleasingly amusing fare. There are three genuinely funny moments, which is about five more than this reviewer found in what passes for a brilliant comedy movie of today, so I`d say that puts Soft Beds in front.

*On the `Allo `Allo parallel, there is one scene where Richard Marner (who played Colonel Von Strohm) appears as a jailer. Curiously, his voice - like a large number of the cast and not least the girls - is dubbed.

Video

The feature and the extras are all presented in 1.85 anamorphic. The image is slightly soft, although that may be down to cinematographer Gilbert Taylor (later to photograph Star Wars for George Lucas). There are no compression artefacts visible, and the print is stable and colourful with excellent contrast. Print damage is at an absolute minimum, being quite outstanding for a British release of this era.

Audio

The sound is Dolby Digital 2.0 Mono, which is only to be expected, but as with the image, there is little damage to the soundtrack so there is a marked absence of snap, crackle or pop.

Features

The extras consist of alternative or extended cuts of over twenty scenes (although the blackout between each clip is a little longer than needed). The main difference between the original 107 minute version and the 97 minute general release version (the latter of which is the main feature), is the elimination of the original narration provided by Peter Sellers. In the final print this was replaced by a narration delivered by another actor in Nixonian tones. I agree with Jitendar that this narration was a mistake, although the original while being similarly intrusive, would have fitted better being in Seller`s impeccable French accent. There are a few other trims, where jokes have been cut, most notably a scene where the Japanese Prince commits seppuku rather than surrender to the British. In the final movie his car is bombed on the road by the RAF.

Conclusion

Overall, this is a better movie than I expected. I had thought I would probably confirm the opinion that it was just a tawdry sex comedy. It`s most likely I`m just a throwback to the `seventies, but I enjoyed the movie. I suspect if you`re a fan of movies like the Carry Ons, or Frankie Howerd`s Up.. movies, you`ll probably enjoy this one. If you`re even remotely politically correct, you might not. But then I`m not politically correct, and I never will be.