Review of Invasion U.S.A.

Introduction

America wasn`t ready…but he was!

Golan Globus productions became synonymous with the 70`s & 80`s, the Israeli duo being responsible for such over the top actions flick series as Death Wish, Missing In Action and American Ninja. The Cannon Group, formed by Golan and Globus, went bankrupt in 1989 and so the world lost a primary manufacturer of mindless action films.

A couple of years previous to this, however, the duo produced Invasion USA; the script co-written by it`s star, Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris is one of a long line of professional sportmen turned actor, the latter term often used very loosely. Norris won the World Professional Middleweight Karate championships in 1968 and held that title until 1974, whereupon he retired. His first real film was Slaughter In New York from the year he retired, although he also made some notable appearances in both Enter The Dragon (1973) and the earlier Fury Of The Dragon (1972) alongside Bruce Lee.

Invasion USA stars Norris as ex-CIA super-secret-agent Matt Hunter, a retired one-man army who now uses his military training to catch alligators. Word reaches the authorities that Russian agent Rostov (Richard Lynch) is planning something big within the US borders and try to entice Hunter back onto the payroll to track him down. Hunter, in the spirit of all retired action heroes, isn`t interested and just wants to be left alone. Hunter had the opportunity to kill Rostov somewhere in the back history to this film, but was refused permission by the ever-incompetent men in charge. Rostov hasn`t forgotten either. He`s planning the invasion of the US hinted at in the title, but suffers nightmares of his experience at the hands of Hunter and diverts his resources from his plan to despatch the laid-back but deadly Hunter. Blowing up his house, killing his old friend, and maybe just about incinerating his pet armadillo in the process, Hunter gets angry and you wouldn`t like him when he`s angry…

Video

Presented in a 1.85:1 aspect ratio, the picture is relatively decent for a film nearly twenty years old. There is grain and there is some print damage in a couple of places. On the other hand, this film was never going to raise enough interest to warrant re-mastering.

Audio

Loud bangs and corny dialogue delivered over DD 2.0 Stereo. Again, adequate for what it is.

Features

What features?

Conclusion

This was billed as an action flick and hinted that America was so complacent that an invasion wasn`t just possible but quite likely. Unfortunately, a lack lustre script, some awful set pieces and cliché-ridden performances make Invasion USA more a bad comedy.

You know exactly what you`re going to get right at the beginning. In a long and slow paced introduction (compared to the rest of the film) a boat of starving Cuban refugees searching for the promised land of the US of A spot an approaching Customs boat. Their hopes for salvation are dashed though as we see the Captain of this vessel is Richard Lynch and half a minute later they are all dead. Lynch plays his usual 80`s evil dude role and you`d be hard pressed to notice the difference between his character Rostov and any of the other 250-thousand other evil dude roles he`s played.

The actual invasion consists of a couple of old WWII landing craft filled with a mix of nationalities who dash off the craft like a bad war movie, yelling their heads off, only to then calmly disperse to the far reaches of the USA via a fleet of trucks and cars waiting for them (which is some logistics operation by Rostov, obviously done during a gap in his busy schedule of killing everyone he meets). Rostov`s aide despatches a nearby courting couple with a shot to the head, presumably to save them from having to over-act as well, but failing to realise that they couldn`t have helped but hear all the vehicles being parked and so were obviously uninterested in any forthcoming invasion of their country. That`s teenagers for you.

The US is gripped by a series of bad shootings, malls and Spanish disco`s, and the authorities are unable to stop or even identify any of the bad guys. This is understandable to a degree as they are all driving round in unmarked cars, but unfortunately they all forgot to take off the faded greens and misshapen berets that are the terrorist standard. Added to that the fact they drive really badly really fast and blow up family homes with bazookas, it hardly inspires confidence in the US authorities. Fortunately for America, Chuck Norris telepathically knows where they all are and calmly steps in to despatch every single one single-handedly, apart from the set piece at the end where the National Guard are allowed a piece of the action in a gloriously over the top battle sequence.

Although Norris works alone, his `buddy` of sorts is a female press photographer who is at most of the scenes of devastation taking snaps. More of an antagonist than partner, you actually end up wishing that someone would just put Norris out of his misery and off her as well. Norris says very little in this film, and little acting is required on his part other than some moody looks that the likes of Van Damme and Lundgren would attempt to make their own a little later. This is a little surprising when you consider he co-wrote it. On the other hand, maybe he realised just how bad it all was and that he was better off just kicking butt in this one.

Anyone wanting to see Norris in anything good should just invest in Lone Wolf McQuade…